Sometimes people just don’t understand. There are some sweet ways to adhere to standard wedding etiquette and still keep everyone’s feelings in tact. You are in charge of your wedding and there are a few things you can do to make it abundantly clear to everyone, including family and friends, who you want to share in your celebrations. Flawlessly manage your wedding guest list and say no to these unwanted guests with the following advice.
Make RSVPs Mandatory
Here’s the thing, we all want our single friend who’s just found love to bring her new beau to our wedding day–but is there room at the reception? If people RSVP no, of course there is! Make sure all guests know that if they don’t RSVP by a certain date, their place setting could go to Auntie Mary on your other half’s mother’s brother’s side of the family.
Don’t Be Afraid To Be Blunt
When it comes to your ‘sort of’ single friends, unless it’s serious – SAY NO! At the very least, don’t be afraid to offer an invite to the after bash. Unless your friends are married, engaged, or in a relationship, it’s okay to not give them a plus one. No one wants their random ‘Plenty of Fish’ date showing up on your special day. Totes awks.
Make a Rule
The happy couple should always sit down and make a rule when it comes to guest lists. Decide what type of wedding you want to have. Are you including extended family? Friends from uni? Friends you just spend time with now? Childhood friends? Cousins? This is a great way foundation to start building on.
Rules can include:
A small intimate affair with friends and family only
Friends are allowed a plus one (or not)
An adult only affair
Only children from immediate family
Let Everyone In On The Rule
Simply put: make it known. You can include this in your invitations, or just make it well known amongst family and friends. Also, stick to your guns. Don’t let people, especially family members, bully you into compromising on what you and your partner have decided is your guest list rule! You can also spread the work via social media or wedding apps. The last thing you want to do is to offend people so just explain your reason in a sweet way. Enlist a family member or close friend to help spread the word.
The Offended
There will always be someone who feels offended. These are the people you should get to first! In this day in age, with social media, you should talk to them before they see some sort of post. A simple, “We’d love to have you there but our budget won’t allow, we hope you understand” should suffice. Let them know you’d like to include them in celebrating your wedding in another way at a later date. Schedule a private brunch or drinks with them after your honeymoon.
When All Else Fails
Enlist some muscle. There’s always someone who will make some fuss. So, hand it over to a wedding planner or someone in your family that is notorious for not giving in. They can help you sort out the rogue member and get your guest list tamed in time for your big day.
-By Theresa Gibson
Theresa Gibson is a wedding blogger and social media manager at top10weddingvendors.com, a leading go-to vendor guide for brides across North America. To connect with Theresa, follow her on Facebook.
Image Credit: Cassidy Carson Photography.
